UK Road Trip
Chris’s younger brother, James had arrived over from Australia and so the three of us embarked on a mission of showing him around as much of England as we could in four days, before we dived off deep into Essex for the V2001 music festival. The plan was decided about five minutes before it was actioned, so it was a very much ‘see what happens’ kind of an event. Here’s what actually did happen.
Monday 13th August
After getting packed and cleaning up a bit we zipped off to pick up the car and started our journey heading west. We had decided to have a look at Stonehenge and also Windsor Castle, but didn’t quite figure out where either of them were in relation to each other, but ended up visiting both and after heading the wrong way for an hour or so we found refuge in Bath for the evening. Bath provided us with a couple of photo opportunities and, being a student town a large number of places to drink. After seeing a few of the sights around town and kicking the footy around a bit, we enlisted the help of the hostel reception guy who gave us an itinerary for the evening, then headed out on his recommendation to the King William, a small pub that sells authentic Somerset cider. Suffice to say that after three pints each of ‘Old Thatchers’ at about 8% abv it was a shaky walk to the next couple of pubs, one of which was a Salsa bar full of people dancing. Well that’s what I remember. During the night James asked a few people if they knew where the toilets were, just the usual; the Publican of a pub – in his pub, a resident in the hostel – standing outside the toilet door. That kind of thing. It seemed quite amusing at the time.
Tuesday 14th August
An early start this morning was facilitated by the
local parking regulations, and after a pretty good brekky at the hostel, we
embarked on the next part of the trip to the Lakes District. There were three
very tired lads in the car this morning, after navigating our way slowly through
morning rush hour traffic in Bristol we hit the open road where Chris got very
tired and there was a driver change on the hard shoulder of the M5. Eventually
we arrived in Windermere and after sorting accommodation and a golf course in
Keswick, we headed there to dump our gear and play golf. The Keswick course was
pretty spectacular in the same way that our golf wasn’t. After starting with
eleven balls, we managed to lose all but two despite 
finding five more along the way. James walked the last
two holes. I will always remember the longest drive competition on the last
hole. Its not very often you win one of these with a five-metre drive! A few
drinks and then it was home to a much-needed sleep. The next morning we got up
and wandered into town after another Full English at the hostel, where we sorted
out a short walk for the morning. We started off walking around the Derwent
Water, near Keswick and about halfway round found a track leading up the hill.
We decided to follow it and ended up the top of a fell (for fell, read mountain,
for people from countries with mountains, read large hill). It took a fair while
to climb up, but we decided to run down and managed to catch the launch back to
Keswick where we had lunch, meaning that the walk around the lake was luckily
averted.
Thursday 16th August
Yesterday afternoon we drove down to Leeds and after finding
accommodation (there are no hostels in Leeds and the B&B places were limited
as a result of the Ashes test starting the next day) we proceeded to get lost a
number of times trying to find Lynwood house where we were to stay the night.
After finding our home for the night we got ready, teamed
up with an Aussie bloke called Dave who was
also staying there and headed out on the town to see the England v Holland
football game. The pub of the taxi driver’s recommendation turned out to be
a Springbok Bar. We managed to acquire the usual
drunkenness. Upon arriving home
James should have been having a conversation with the big white telephone but
instead he talked to the sheets on his bed and then put his head in the remnants
of the dialogue about chicken burgers and snakebites. Luckily his older brother
was on hand to clean up. I, on the other hand slept through the entire affair.
This morning was another slow start but after another full English cooked by
Marg’ and some sporting banter with Dougie, we jumped in the car with Dave and
proceeded to York where we booked in the hostel and continued on to the
Yorkshire coast over the Moors to Whitby. At Whitby we looked at the usual
attractions (Abby that inspired Bram Stoker to write Dracula, Captain Cook’s
memorial and fish and chips) before the rain came and after a couple of U-turns
we headed back to York. In York we watched the cricket for a bit, then went on a
Ghost tour of what is apparently one of the most haunted cities in the world - I
rated the Edinburgh tour higher however. Luckily we still managed to get a bit
drunk and this helped at 4:00am-ish when I told the couple that were having sex
in our dorm room to “piss off” or words to that effect.
Sunday 19th August
On Friday we left York and plummeted down the M1 to London, arriving at the flat after dropping the car off at around 1:00. We showered and changed and packed for the next few days before tubing to Liverpool St station where we met Andy over a beer. Then we jumped on the train to Chelmsford where we had a little walk before getting our tents sorted for the next couple of nights at the V2001 music festival. At this stage we also met Adam, Lee, Lee, Emm, Jess, Lorraine, Sarah, Steve et al who had found the best spot in the camping area and with whom were to share the next couple of days.
The first night was pretty cold under blue starry,
cloudless skies but after the beers everything seemed to be reasonably warm.
Everyone got drunk in readiness for the next two days of overloading on music,
alcohol, overused portaloos and all the other usual things with which one
associates with a music festival. Up early the next morning, we quickly finished
off a Stella, then cooked up a few snarlers for brekky and started drinking
properly. By 12:30 we had played a few drinking games, organised our bottles of
bourbon into virgin cola bottles and started our trek towards the main (V)
stage. 
First up was Jimmy Barnes who despite his years gave a
pretty good show, and so might I add did we. During Coldplay, we decided to head
towards the JJB Arena (inside) where we hoped to catch Turin Brakes, but
unluckily for us it also started to rain about then and we got stuck in a queue
for an hour and a half before James and I stormed the gate and pushed our way to
within a couple of metres of the front. Kylie was fantastic, and by the time her
show had finished I was no longer wet and cold, in fact quite the opposite!
The next morning, it was a couple of quick Stellas and then up and into the last of the bourbon before the vodka. The rain gradually cleared, but we decided to stay in the Dance (slinky) tent for a while, until Neil Finn started on the main stage. After that we went back to the dance tent with a couple of new found friends who kindly offered a ride back to London to Andy and myself, saving all sorts of heartache. After dancing for a bit we went back for the Foo Fighters which I cant remember a whole lot of, and then the Red Hot Chillies which were pretty good really – then off home to bed finishing a generally fantastic week.